The loss of a parent is one of the most devastating and heart-wrenching experiences most of us will face in life. Whether the death comes all of a sudden or after a long illness, the pain of this loss deeply hurts. This loss is not something that someone will just “get over.” Nothing will replace your loved one, but over time you will learn to cope and go on living your life.
The initial shock
Dealing with the loss of a parent can be a long and strenuous endeavor. You will likely be feeling senses of sadness, anger, frustration, and confusion. Losing someone so near and dear to your heart can seem like a nightmare. This is a person who raised and guided you as a child. They might have been your closest confidant and advice giver. No matter what kind of a relationship you had with your parent, this loss will have an effect on you.
When dealing with the loss of a parent, there is a significant amount of planning that you will have on your plate. Having to deal with these issues while in grief can be incredibly disheartening. Among these duties include finding the right funeral home service, choosing a casket, estate planning, and more. This can be overwhelming for anyone. You do not have to go at it alone. There is no shame in asking for help. While everyone is going through their own grieving process. Many of them, however, may not be as personally connected to the deceased as you are. They might be willing to help you handle the more technical aspects of this process. This time can be used to come together as a family. You and your other family members should get together and carefully plan the next steps of this process. You can agree to divvy out different tasks to everyone involved.
There are a number of important decisions to be made at this point. For most families, the loved one should have let their final wishes known. Among these decisions include whether to choose a traditional burial or employ cremation services. The choice of cremation has been on the rise in recent years. It is a much more affordable option. It is also more environmentally friendly. While these questions are usually answered before the parent’s passing, sometimes their death comes all of a sudden. This leaves no time to address these issues.
When a loved one passes before final arrangements are made; their families are often left to play detective. If you find yourself in this situation after a loss of a parent, you might need to do some deep soul searching. Think about your parent and what they would have wanted. You might be considering what flowers they would have liked at the funeral. Think about some of their favorite flowers before browsing florist websites or meeting with the florist. You can also interview others who were close to them. Although you may have had a close relationship with your parent, an old friend may give you a different perspective. You might also enjoy hearing any old stories from them as well.
Mentally coping with the loss of a parent
After the funeral, life eventually returns to some sense of normalcy. During this time, we try to go on living our life. This can often be a complicated matter. In the immediate aftermath of the loss of a parent, children receive an outpouring of support. Over time, however, you might struggle to find some of that support. The assumption is that they are fine now. This can often be a period when support is needed the most. You might feel a sense of grief during rather routine activities. Something might impulsively remind you of your parent and sadness will overwhelm your emotions. Seeking grief counseling can be extremely helpful in the mourning period.
A quality grief counselor can help you come to terms with the loss of a parent. When searching for a counselor, it is important to recognize what kind of therapy might work best. For someone wanting a more spiritually or religiously based therapy, they would be best served with a spiritual coach. Assurance that your loved one is in a better place can be comforting in this trying time.
A grief counselor can adapt your therapy to better suit your needs. Everyone has a different relationship with their parents. You might have been extremely close with your parents. Counseling can help you cope with the loss of a parent. Unfortunately, many people have complicated or distant relationships with their parent. They will likely be feeling a whole range of emotions. They will want counseling that helps them come to terms with their hurt.
As you deal with mentally coping with this process, you can use this as a way to better align your emotions. You can reach a sense of wellness in your life. Mental, emotional, and physical wellness is important to anyone. This may involve changing your eating habits and pursuing a healthy lifestyle.
You might be interested in searching for healthy recipe ideas. During a depressed period, many people admit to eating unhealthy food. While comfort food can be great at this time, it is important that it does not turn into a habit. A healthy lifestyle will not only affect your physical health, but your mental health as well. It can improve your mood and help to reduce irritability. While healthy living will not transform your grief, it does have several positive effects for you.
The effects of grief
When coping with the loss of a parent, you may notice several distinct effects of your grief. These effects are both physical and mental. One of the most common repercussions of grief is a lack of sleep. When overcome with grief, our minds are going a mile a minute. This often happens late at night. This is the time when you are by yourself. As your mind is racing, getting a decent night’s sleep can be a near impossibility. About one in five people admit that they are up at 5AM. While many are up after a full night’s rest, some may be up due to lack of sleep. The effects of sleep deprivation can have significant consequences on your health.
The lethargy derived from lack of sleep could cause you to struggle in your everyday routine. You might struggle to concentrate at work. For someone, whose job involves physical work, the consequences can be devastating. It is also dangerous for someone suffering from sleep deprivation to get behind the wheel of a car. Driving while tired can be almost as bad as driving under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Only get behind the wheel if you feel completely comfortable.
Finding ways to cope
There are several positive ways to cope with the loss of a parent. Finding a hobby can help ease your mind and reduce stress. Your new hobby can be your “happy place.” It can be a nice distraction of the stresses of life. You might be interested in hobbies such as reading, painting, gardening, and more. Your loved ones would not want to mope and fail to move on. They would want you to live your life and enjoy it. Taking part in a hobby can show that you are living life to the fullest.
Although not a hobby, some may choose to start a new home improvement project to help themselves cope with the loss of a parent. It can come as a welcomed distraction from the grief you may be feeling. During these distressing times, many people admit to letting other tasks and projects fall by the wayside. By not forgetting about them, it will help you return to your previous life. Before you begin your project, contacting a remodeling contractor is a great option.
Gardening is another great remodeling project that you can work on. There are a number of important items to consider before you begin your gardening project. Decorative mulch can really accentuate the garden and add a little more color to an already beautiful area. Deciding on the right flowers is the key to an impressive garden. You can talk to your local florist for suggestions. They can help you determine which would be right for your yard. Once you have planted your flowers, proper maintenance is essential. Make sure that you are giving them plenty of water and sunlight so that they may grow. As long as you are diligent in the maintenance, your garden is sure to impress.
A new pet for comfort
One of the most devastating effects of the loss of a parent is the sense of loneliness. This is someone who has been a huge part of your life for a long time. Acclimating to life without them can be an arduous task. Those coping with this loss may seek a source of comfort to aid in this life transition. A new pet can help to comfort these grieving people in their time of need.
A new pet is definitely not a “replacement” for a deceased parent. They can, however, provide some relief to those who are mourning. A happy puppy, rushing to greet you at the door, can put a smile on anyone’s face. While they cannot take away all of your pain, they can provide some solace to you.
Pets are a major responsibility. They depend on you for all of their wants or needs. This can actually be an advantage in this situation. Those in a depressed mood often feel helpless and without purpose. Taking care of a pet is a wonderful purpose. The responsibility can help keep your mind focused and engaged. Pets need heavily structured routines. Adhering to these schedules can give your life a sense of balance and normalcy. Those who are depressed may struggle to rise out of bed in the morning. A pet that needs their morning walk can be that reason. Providing pet care can give you that much-needed sense of purpose in this trying time.
Welcoming a new pet into your home is a major life decision. This should not be decided flippantly. The benefits of having a pet are great, but only if the new owner is up to the task. For many people, the responsibility of a pet is too great of an endeavor. Some may find it too emotionally taxing. For those in this situation, you would be best advised to not take in a new pet. Among the major responsibilities associated with pet care are, walking, feeding, trips to the veterinarian, medication, and grooming.
If you have to go away for a period of time, finding appropriate care is essential. You can choose trusted friends or family. You might also want to consider local dog kennels to take care of your four-legged friend. If you are a frequent traveler, a pet may not be the best option. Leaving your dog or cat away from you for long periods of time may be jarring to their routine. The pet may struggle to adapt. Pets can provide so much peace and comfort, especially to those who are grieving. They are a major responsibility and should only be entrusted to those who are willing and able to provide the love and care that they need.
The loss of a parent is an experience that is quite painful for anyone. We all grieve in different ways and there are no set standards for how you should grieve. There is no right or wrong way to mourn your loved ones. The way we grieve is often predicated on the type of relationship we had with our parents. Sometimes the relationship may not be as close-knit as we would’ve liked. Someone may have been in the midst of a hostile fight at the time of the death. The unresolved conflict can be incredibly disheartening. It is important that you do not dwell on this minor hiccup. Think about the many happy memories you shared with your parent. These happy memories can help you in your quest to return to normalcy.